Spooky...
Here's the new room! It's kind of just another recreation room, but the emphasis is more on relaxation. I've given our lucky Crombies a minibar, another fridge, a cooker, and space to prepare food. The thing next to the counters is some sort of dessert holder, I forget exactly. I railed off the stairs, but there was still a space so I stuck a gigantic teddy bear there to give anyone coming up them a bit of a scare.
The room also has a great big plasma TV, a console, a pinball machine and two arcade machines, and a fireplace. With sprinklers. The Crombies could probably set fire to sandstone if they tried hard enough.
Eh... doesn't look quite right does it?
I also made a small balcony out front with a hot tub so our sims can enjoy those moonlit nights in the comfort of warm, swirling water.
Finally, King Maurice receives some much-deserved ambience thanks to a couple of lampposts.
Looking good isn't it? Just a few more minor changes before we unleash the sims.
I think it would be neat if our sims played chess. Catriona needs a logic point but she hasn't given the telescope or the chess set by the swimming pool even a first glance. Why do these guys make it so hard for me to help them?
Hmm. I should put a table up there too so the Crombies can eat anything they prepared using the new kitchen. I'll do that tomorrow.
I've set up a bonfire out back. They haven't got a back door, so I don't know if they'll even attempt to light it. The untouched pile is illuminated by some sort of eerie glow... and it's definitely not hedgehogs.
Is that a panda in there? That's just not right.
My final touch was to remove the ground floor stairs which are now redundant so I can put a dartboard in the most dangerous possible place.
Now... where were we?
Ah, yes. This is the 'Social bunny'. If a sim gets psychotically lonely then the social bunny falls from the sky and talks to them. It's all a figment of the sim's imagination... and it appears Pyke is imagining that the bunny is watching her through two solid walls.
She's messed up.
Pyke calmly observes the monstrous creature bounding towards her.
If I saw a one-eyed man-sized rabbit quickly hopping towards me with the single-minded intent of a violent rapist, I would not think it was as hilarious as Pyke clearly does.
I wait to see how they interact. What would Pyke do if she'd been in Donnie Darko? It's a question we've all asked ourselves, even if we don't want to admit it. They stare at each other. For two hours. That's all they did. Well, after the first hour, the bunny randomly started juggling wee action figurines or something.
Even Frank would have quailed in the face of such enigma.
Random article on Wikipedia is so much fun. I had no idea that some scallops are protoandrous hermaphrodites. Well, you've got to laugh haven't you?
Goddammit Pyke, why the silence?! This should be comedy gold!
Pyke makes a break for it; her carpool is so tantalisingly close! The bunny's pretty fast. I'm not sure she'll make it.
'DAW CLOHZINGK!'
Pyke gets into the carpool and speeds off. Now everyone except Jack is at work. What's a man to do, what's a man to do...
Oh, for Christ's sake, FUCK OFF AMIN!
Since he's got nowt to do, I tell Jack to head to one of the community lots. Should be plenty of interesting things happening there!
A random selection from the menu yields 'Rodney's Hideout'. Let's have a goosey.
A quiet place to relax, eat, and gamble.
Jack scouts for hawt chiks.
Nice young woman eating blood and intestine soup at five o' clock... looks like she got lost on the way to the opera... looking sophisticated... go Jack go! This is your chance!
'HELLO OLD WOMAN WOULD YOU LIKE TO PLAY POKER'
According to the game, this woman is called 'Mrs Crumplebottom'. Jack, you have excellent, and discerning taste.
You only have to look at her to know that Jack's not going to win a single hand. He's going to get his home repossessed, he's going to have to sell his hair to wigmakers, and go to university to try and get an arts degree.
Zing!
The two and three of bumps... is that good? Maybe I should say 'Go Fish'.
What the- Jack, you fancy pants! It makes me feel quite inadequate, I can barely shuffle cards.
'I... I think it was Professor Plum in the attic with the submachine gun.'
'Raise or fold, young man!'
'Can't I just take a forfeit?'
A man in a bright red suit joins the table. I can't remember his name so let's call him Brian. I don't think Jack's got much hope now he's playing against someone who looks like a damn croupier. Well, you can still get through this man, just play your cards close to your chest and don't give them any more of an edge...
'I think I'm going to win!'
Shortly afterwards, the red suited man leaves and is replaced by Nathen. Nathen leaves immediately after sitting down, and he is then replaced by this woman.
'I bet money.'
'I see your money and raise gold.'
She's leading you, Jack...
'Hey, maybe after all this we could go and get some ice cream! We could be the best of friends in this crazy, crazy world!'
Jack buggers it all up with a fat joke.
'Nathen, what's that you're slicing?'
'I want to see if I can turn your average human leg into a candle holder.'
'That's pretty gross, man.'
'I love it like it was my own little baby.'
The waitress gives Jack a withering look. Perhaps he wronged her at some point in the past.
She gets revenge with a serrated circular tray. Stylish.
It's just about time to go home, but Jack insists on putting his hand up to ask if he can be excused. Old habits die hard.
Home sweet ho- where the hell is he? He didn't get left behind somehow did he? This is not good.
Nooreen and Catriona arrive home from work in the same carpool. Handy!
Catriona looks kinda furious.
There he is! He'd been manipulating the steering wheel and brakes with a complicated pulley system of strings from a makeshift strap he'd attached to the underside of the car to fool me, the little scamp.
Nooreen gives Catriona a heavy beating before they enter the house. She said something about Macs not being as good as PCs and now, if I'm looking at this image correctly, she's probably going to need to search for her teeth on the ground for a while.
All that poker left Jack exhausted. This is him face-first in his toaster pastry. Actually, now I look at it closely, I think his nose may have completely gone through the tabletop.
Jack and Nooreen are sleeping in the same bed again. I think it just goes to show how common the bed-sharing has become that I don't feel moved to screenshot it whenever it happens. Catriona is still outside.
'FUCKING L-BLOCKS!'
Pyke's home again too, but she's camera shy.
Linuxgirl123: Yeh, hes sniffing the carpet now its really weird
IHeartKittens: I WISH I HAD A BUNNY ^_^
The creaking of the floor, the wind in the eaves... 'twas a night for tales of horror that chill through the blood and bone of any good Christian man or woman. The backlight of the computer's monitor was reminiscent of candlelight, the shadows danced their own peculiar, mysterious jig, and there was nothing else that stirred in that house.
At least... nothing with a SOUL.
'Man, fuck burglars.'
Aw, isn't that nice? Jack's made enough spaghetti bolognese for everyone!
Though Nooreen is too busy playing electric guitar to think about dinner...
... Catriona is sleeping on a park bench outside...
... and Pyke is... well... she's busy.
In the image of Jack serving out the spaghetti, you may have noticed that there was an empty bowl left there by someone else. Because there was no space left for Jack to eat his own dinner, he left the kitchen, took the lift, and is eating here instead. What a crazy coot.
Nothing interesting is happening, so let's get these Crombies out into the neighbourhood! It's time for a trip! A quick glance tells me that only Pyke is too tired to go, so I send her to bed and everyone else to the car.
'Catriona, I think we should go to Iraq!'
'I do not think that is a good idea.'
I only want Catriona, Jack, and Nooreen to go but it won't let me. By the time I've given up, Pyke has regained enough energy to come after all. I guess that's an upside! I hurriedly tell everyone to get in again because they keep leaving the car to have a pee, or run a bath or something.
Catriona was in the back and Pyke opened the door on her side to get in... and Catriona disappeared! Utterly vapourised! The computer still tells me she's in the car so I let them drive off. My theory is that Pyke stuffed her in the boot while no one was looking.
Tonight... we dance!
Out of curiosity, when I sent Pyke to bed I told her to sleep in her pyjamas. Pyke and Catriona only ever sleep in their underwear and Nooreen and Jack only ever sleep wearing pyjamas. I don't know why. Anyway: look at those pyjamas! Bloody hell! They look like they've never been washed in all their existence, which, when you consider they've never been worn at all, is saying something.
Catriona, you could have played that on the way over couldn't you? Huh?
Jack enters the gents' and scrubs himself clean with a sponge. As necessary as that might have been, I think I could have done without the pleasurably satisfied grunts he's terrifying passing patrons with.
'This wall has such a lovely pattern!'
Pyke is in a foul mood, and takes out her anger by stomping on this cat, snapping its little spine in two.
Pyke kneels down to claim her prize and OMG I CAN SEE RIGHT UP HER PYJAMAS!
... Kinda looks like a big red splodge. Gross, gross, gross, gross...
Nooreen thinks about money a lot. If anyone tells her that I've got over eight hundred thousand simoleons in their account she might have an aneurysm.
WAY TO HAVE A NIGHT OUT TOGETHER GUYS.
'Nooreen, I just saw you on the telly! Something about you and a sumo wrestler-!'
'I don't wanna talk about it.'
Pyke sponge-bathes herself too. Gotta get the smell of dead cat off you before hitting the dance floor.
(??? WHAAAAT ???)
'Hey, Catriona, I can feel this burning sensation on the back of my head... Nooreen isn't staring at me is she?!'
'I think she might be.'
'Shit.'
'Hey, Jack, look on the bright side!'
Nooreen remains silent, except for her eyes which are beginning to glow with a crackling noise.
'I really, really LOVE this wall!'
'Nooreen, I know you burned a swear word into the back of my skull, but I think we could still be friends.'
Catriona, meanwhile, is just... sitting. Again. I wonder what's going on in that mind of hers...
'Gee Brain, what do you want to do tonight?'
'The same thing we do every night, Consciousness — try to take over the world.'
'That's the fifth time you've come here in the same outfit as me, Larry. It just won't do.'
'SORRY, BRIAN.'
One other thing I haven't mentioned is that Pyke is ALWAYS talking about briefcases. I think she just really likes briefcases. And she's in her normal clothes... did she bring them with her? In which case, why did she arrive at a nightclub in her pyjamas anyway? I- wha- *head asplode*
'Do you like briefcases?'
'Say no, Larry, it's a trick question!'
'HELLS NO, I HATE BRIEFCASES, WHAT I LIKE IS BOATS, BIG FUCK-OFF BOATS, OR CATS WITH BOATS FOR A HEAD.'
Catriona, don't you do this! Don't you walk down that path! There's no return!
NOOREEN YOU RETURN TO THE MINIBAR THIS INSTANT Y'HEAR ME?!
FUUUUUUUUU-
Jack looks around, hoping no one just saw the cat piss on him. This is why pets aren't usually allowed in nightclubs, you know.
'Larry, I think you've been taking too much LSD'
'YOU'RE NOT PYKE YOU'RE AN EVIL LIGHT BULB.'
What is this thing? I haven't the foggiest idea. Whatever it is, it's making its user extremely dizzy.
'NO.'
Pyke then bursts into tears.
The only creatures I've seen with mouths like that were in horror movies.
Nooreen's dancing! Actually DANCING! In a fucking NIGHTCLUB! Excuse me, I'm feeling a little emotional, they're actually doing something appropriate to their surroundings!
Looking cool, Noo-na.
If you've been wondering what Catriona's been up to this whole time, I'll tell you. After washing the dishes, she stood next to this sink for about three hours.
Why? Well, she's dirty and wants to have a sponge bath using the sink next to her, but there's a chef in the same room and she doesn't want the chef to see her naked body. So for the last three hours she's been repeatedly trying to shoo the chef from her own kitchen with zero success. Sigh.
'Hey, man, isn't that the girl who was on TV? The one who indecently assaulted that sumo wrestler with a bottle of vegetable oil?'
'Where?'
'Oh pooh, she just stole our food.'
It's time we took these guys back, Catriona's nearly unconscious and I've had enough of watching them treat every place they visit as if it was their own home.
Pyke is wearing her pyjamas again? Wha- bu- if she- wha- *BOOM*
Tragic.
Catriona and Jack are both exhausted and both slip into the spare room bed. Pyke and Nooreen decide to have some cereal. Since the kitchen table is full, they head to the table up on the first floor balcony.
'For fuck's sake, Nooreen, you burned my frosties.'
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